Miranda and Me

Michael and I had an appointment yesterday with the Department of Psychiatry and Pediatric Behavorial Health at Kaiser in our attempt to understand Miranda's pooping issues. We had run out of medical options at Kaiser and our pediatrician suggested we go this route.

It was a very interesting conversation (although too long according to Michael). We talked a lot about Miranda's character traits and behaviors in other areas and I got some good information about how better to relate to her and engage with her. For example, when I asked everyone to get their shoes on and Parker goes and does it and Elizabeth goes and does it and Miranda continues talking to her bunny friends seemingly unaware that I exist, I'm suppose to, rather than rolling my eyes and getting annoyed that she is always behind, go up to her and say, "You seem to have better things to do like play with your animals and making up super interesting stories with them, so can I help you put your shoes on?" This will be hard for me to do, but I'm going try really hard.

In terms of her poop, she suggested we tell Miranda that she is "now in charge of her own body and her own poop and we aren't going to tell her when to go to the toilet or carry her to the toilet. But that if she needs help, she can ask for it and we will help her."

So I did and as I was telling her this during lunch she was looking at me, smiling and nodding. She was the most engaged in something I was saying that I can remember.

Then she went off to play. Ten minutes later she walked into the bathroom and sat with her doll for a while. I walked past and she was just sitting on the step stool talking to her baby. I didn't say anything and went back to sit down. Then five minutes later she started crying. I went in to ask her if she needed help (something the doc said was ok if she was crying) and she said yes. She said it hurt. She said she was scared. Then she pooped. I didn't congratulate her or talk about it anymore. We just wiped her up, put on some cream (at her request) and went on our way.

I find it hard to believe this was a coincidence (especially since she only poops every three days and this was day two) and for that reason alone, I am encouraged...a feeling I haven't felt in a long time with her.