Some nights are good. Some are not.

Tonight, I went to a Billy Joel concert with my friend Ebba. I got the tickets on a whim, despite how outrageously expensive they were and we had a great time. I knew all but one song, enjoyed watching all the "old" people singing along, and only left wishing just once he would sing All for Layna. The night was super. About 1000 times better than last night when I sat in the ER with Elizabeth for 3 hours.

You see, all during the day yesterday, Eli had this cough. The one she always gets when she is going to get or has gotten a cold. So I didn't think much of it and was comforted by the fact that we still had the nebulizer if we needed to spray her with some pulmicort or allbuturol. She went to bed about 6ish and was fine until 10ish when she woke up crying, standing up in her crib and would not go back to sleep. Her breathing was really labored and I got scared. So we took her out of bed, gave her a second dose (Michael had done one earlier) of allbuturol and took her to the cabana with me so I could keep a close eye on her. Her breathing got worse. She couldn't sleep because her cough kept waking her up and she couldn't breathe very well. Michael called the advice nurse while I stayed with her.

"Try two more rounds of nebulizing and I'll call you back in a hour to check to see how she is. If there isn't marked improvement, she should go in."

So we did and there wasn't and I went.

Children's hospital's ER was packed and I readied myself for a long wait. But...I was immediately, after explaining her symptoms and showing her temperature (now 102) to the triage nurse put in a private room and told someone would be by. This made me even more nervous. Could it be that bad that she needs to be seen right away? Is it more serious than the head laceration, vaginal pain, and buttocks abscess that I oversaw on the nurse's computer screen? I got more scared.

But...my nerves turned to annoyance after sitting and sitting for what seemed forever. It was now midnight and still we had not been seen by the doctor yet. Elizabeth was a real trooper, at first enteraining herself by walking around the room and later, after being hooked up to an oxgygen monitoring thing on her toe, sitting on the exam table with me. We played games (put something in mommy's mouth and watch her sit it out, hide and seek with the exam table blankets), played with the equipment despite signs that told us not to, and tried to relax. Just as she was really crashing, the doctor came in. Questions, more questions, some poking. She leaves. 30 minutes later, another doctor. More questions. More poking.

"It's croup."

More waiting, a steroid, more allbuturol, and finally at 2:30am, we could leave with instructions to "use steam". No shit, sherlock.

Back at home, we put her to bed and Michael snuck back to the cabana to sleep while I went up to be with Parker who had decided hours earlier that he needed to be in "mommy and daddy's bed" even though neither of us were in it. A tantrum at 3am was the one thing I didn't need.

3 hours later...Parker is up and asking to play with his "I knew an old lady who swallowed a fly" oatmeal container that my mom made him. I get it for him and go back to bed. Then he whispers, "I need help with the spider." (The spider, in contrast to the other critters that she swallows, is huge and sometimes gets stuck in the mouth hole.)

At this point, I give in, get up, unstick the spider and go down to get Miranda who has decided it is also time to get up. I sneak in and out, being careful not to bother Elizabeth who needs about 8 hours more sleep.

I fail and Eli gets up too.

So at 7am, just 4 hours after getting home, I'm feeding everyone breakfast and remembering the time, "that we thought we could never have kids."